I’ve often been told I have a nice butt.
Just kidding, the best I’ve ever gotten is that my butt is “not
bad for a white boy.” One can dream though! What I was going to say was that I
have often been told I should write a blog, but now that I think of it, that’s
not really true either. I think I’ve
been told that by two people, but I was so flattered that I got to work
immediately, making all of the preparations necessary for blogdom. One thing led to another, and BOOM! Here’s a blog…3 years later.
No one ever said I didn’t have a problem with
procrastination. In fact, organization
and procrastination seemed to be a favorite topic for my parent teacher
conferences. I always wanted to tell my
teachers, “It’s cool, we already talked about this with my last teacher. Tell my mom how great I am,” but instead they’d say something to the
effect of, “Matthew is very smart, but he has to stay in for recess every day
to finish his homework,” or “You have a bright son, but I’m concerned that he
doesn’t put much effort into schoolwork,” or even, “Are you aware that during
recess, your son and his friends put their arms in their shirts with just their
hands poking out, get down on their knees, and try to knock each other down
with their heads? They call it ‘Midget
Fighting’.” A disorganized, procrastinating, under-motivated, midget-fighting
kid can’t get no respect. On the plus
side I did put two hyphenated words in that last sentence, which my
good-for-nothing mother-in-law tells me is good luck.
So there it is: A blog.
It may not be pretty, but neither is the word “blog.” If I’m not mistaken, it’s a portmanteau of
the words “bloated” and “dog”. Or possibly “barf” and “log”. Either way, I’m not sure when the next one of
these will happen, but until then: Happy barf logging!
